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"Listening" Module Comment

In this module I noticed that the skills of "repeating, rephrasing, and reflecting" were mentioned. Having trained and worked as a clinical counselor prior to working in student services, these were basically some of our bread-and-butter tools and their value really can't be overstated in any communication-based work or setting. That being said, they can also impede communication if they're not done correctly or if the student feels that we're just parroting things back to them without really empathizing or moving with them towards an objective or problem resolution. Avoiding this takes time and practice, but it is also something that is much easier to avoid when you also have access to body language cues. With much of our work taking place over the phone or videoconference (especially now during COVID), these cues are either absent or easier to miss. I was wondering if anyone has any tips or experience on how to most effectively implement these tools in conversations with students where other relational data, such as body language or voice intonation, may be more difficult to get? Thanks! 

User User
asked 08/27/2021 19:51
  • #listening

endorsed by
  • Jim B.
  • Dr. Jean Norris
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Rebecca T
replied 12/22/2021 21:33

I've enjoyed this module in how to utilize one of the three R's when speaking with applicants.  I know I'm using the "repeat" skill quite often and want to make it a goal to develop the skills of rephrase and reflect too.  Thanks!

Jim B.
replied 01/19/2022 17:27

Thank you for your response, Rebecca. It does takes practice to master! You can always practice with your colleagues. It will not only help you, but help them develop those critical skills as well. Thank you for engaging! 

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Jim B.
replied 09/01/2021 20:08

Tyler, Thank you for your post. 

You are correct in emphasizing the importance of being "genuine".  And, there is really no replacement for the in-person experience. Making the necessary adjustments to "phone only" interviews has been no doubt a challenge, but whether in-person or over the phone, it begins by achieving mutual interest. Just having a good, genuine conversation with the student just about anything; their interests, hobbies, family, etc., and uncovering something you both have in common will go a long ways in establishing trust. Once you establish trust in the relationship through your mutual interest, it is a lot easier to address deeper issues/concerns as you go below the surface.  As you alluded to, it takes whatever time it takes to get there. 

Can't wait to hear other responses.  Great question, Tyler! 

User
replied 09/02/2021 15:56

Hi Jim, 

Thanks for the reply. What I'm hearing is that when we have less relational data to go off of we both have to rely more on the conversation content (e.g. establishing mutual interest) and give the connection time to develop organically, which makes perfect sense. Also interested to hear any other responses that people may have. Thanks! 

 

Jim B.
replied 09/15/2021 16:18

You got it, Tyler! 

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Last Activity 01/19/2022 17:27

1 Answer(s)

  • answered 09/03/2021 12:40
    Kelly G.

    Hi Tyler,

    Another great question! Back in the late 2000s I worked for an online call center and we definitely never saw our students during the admissions process because our call center was in Indianapolis and the actual university was in West Virginia, and since that feels like the stone age compared to now, we didn't even use videoconferencing back then.  However; we practiced the 3Rs everyday in every conversation. The first tip I would share is truly be an active listener. It is harder to "see" cues but you can absolutely hear them if you focus and truly the 3Rs help with that, because it allows you to repeat and rephrase what they are saying to ensure that you are understanding, and it is also a time to ask about those, "cues" that you are hearing like voice inflection or confidently stated goals. 

    You are very correct in saying that we don't want to parrot the student because that doesn't show empathy. Just know you will not necessarily use all 3Rs at once because the situation dictates it, for example if there is no emotion, then we wouldn't use reflection. 

    Whether we are in-person or virtual, we always need to strive to be better listeners, you never know what cues you will hear!  

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